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priscilla - November 13th, 2010 3:07 PM

i have a toddler, 28 months old now and she's my adopted child. she is actually my close friend's baby who just passed away 2 years ago with complications in the ovary. she entrusted me with her baby right after she finds out that she has this illness; and yes no father to stand for her (w/c made me decide to keep her with me). it was actually a mutual understanding with me and my husband who seems to agree with my decision and he is kind of OK to that idea since we don't have a baby after 4 yrs of marriage. now we have a baby of our own who's turning one next year. i thought it would be simpler for us now and things will come along as what we wanted it to be. but i was wrong, at her early age, my adopted daughter is having an idea about her being different with us especially when it comes to physical attributes. in addition to that, i am not aware where she got all those stories about her being an adopted child. i am worrying now a lot and i just don't know what to do and where to start. of course i am planning to tell her but not at this early age where she still enjoys the years of being a kid and that nothing else matters. pls help, i am so burnt out with this situation and my husband too.

glenda - November 13th, 2010 3:15 PM

oooh, that's hard though, really, tough tough situation. you are such great parents to your adopted child, you guys deserved to have 2 beautiful kids. did you try to consult parents counseling? if you are feeling very obliged with this situation, you may need to ask a guidance with a counselor who can advice you well with the current problem you are in.

Nora - November 13th, 2010 3:15 PM

you should go with an association where parents have adopted children. you can exchange ideas, topics and experiences and definitely you will learn a lot from the other parents as well.

champaigne - November 13th, 2010 3:33 PM

the decision of telling her as soon as she grows up and understands more the situation is a good one. whoo, so hard because she's too young to know the truth. if there's any other option other than telling her the truth, say like moving to other house or place to avoid stories roaming around, then do it - it is for the sake of your daughter's peace of mind and of course the whole family as well.

Rusellin - November 13th, 2010 4:08 PM

if the worst already sinks in, then maybe it is her right to know the truth. no matter what you do, she will know the truth sooner or later.

brandon - November 13th, 2010 4:10 PM

did you happen to approach her relatives, her biological grandparents? if this happens so often that it bothers her a lot, you might want and need to introduce her to the relatives.

Zaldy - November 13th, 2010 4:14 PM

basically, you are giving yourself the hardest thing to do. if you love her so much and if you think that this will help her understand better the situation she's in at the moment, go on and tell her. but if you think that at this early times, things can be much more complicated for her, then you need a proper timing.

denise - November 13th, 2010 4:29 PM

adoption is not new to our community and is something that most parents who cannot bear kids have this as their last option. in your case, maybe you just need more time before you are going to tell her the truth.

babylove - November 13th, 2010 4:30 PM

first, you need to know if she meant it what she says and if she asked you quite often, then this is really a problem for you.

raddah - November 13th, 2010 4:44 PM

why don't you talk to your husband first, ask him about it, ask his opinion and you guys will decide for the decision to make - you know two heads are better than one.

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