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JellyBeans28 - October 12th, 2010 7:36 PM

Well, 3 months after the birth of my son, I still have no interest in sex. I worry because I know it is frustrating to my husband, even though he doesn't come out and say it. I am breastfeeding, I am tired, and I am self concious about my post-baby body. I do not feel sexy by any means. Is any one else going through this? Have you gone through it and overcome it? How do you learn to be a Mommy and a Sexy Wife?

cindy - October 16th, 2010 8:38 PM

yes i've with this kind of experience before and even until now i feel like having intimacy time to my husband has been deprived from taking care of my kid in which he understands how tired i am. but because it is also our half-duty to toggle spare and intimate times with our husband, i kind of feeling the guilt but i am just so tired being a mom the whole day and instead at the end of the day i straightly go to sleep.

Vivienne - October 25th, 2010 3:49 PM

i guess every woman who gave birth experience this kind of phase in their life and it's normal because we sort of feel the exhaustion to simmer down after giving birth. but don't forget that sex is not the only way to please our partners, there are so many ways to sweep their feet off the ground.

sheila - October 28th, 2010 2:29 AM

i noticed this kind of changes to a lot of my girl friends having no more spark when it comes to their sex life. one thing in common i observed, they're quite too busy with their kids so as the day ends, they all felt quite lazy to do anything more and just sleep over with their husbands.

Lovekids111 - October 28th, 2010 4:29 PM

Hormones take a LONG time to get back to normal, and it is very common to have no sex drive, or lack of interest etc.. You'll rebound in time.

Luv2BMommy - October 28th, 2010 4:30 PM

I felt like one of the FEW positive things about being single when I gave birth was that I had NO pressure to have sex and NO guilt for not having sex. I literally had no sex drive until my son was, oh.... 20 months!

I don't have any ideas to help you, but I just want to say that you really do have to honor your body's recovery and do what feels good. Hopefully you and your hubby can have an open discussion about it and come to some sort of agreement. Good luck.

luvmyEnzo - October 28th, 2010 4:32 PM

Actually I am going through this and did some research online. Basically your sexual hormones are down because you just had a baby. It's your body's natural way of not getting pregnant again. My husband did research too and that really helped him understand how I feel. It also says that if you are breastfeeding (and I am too) that your lack of lubrication comes from breastfeeding itself and sometimes drinking more water is the first thing you should consider doing. The sexual hormones that make you want to have sex are much lower in breastfeeding moms than in regular post partum moms. Sexual drive comes from menstral cycles and ovulation, and if your like me you may not be doing either because of breastfeeding.

MamaBugg - October 28th, 2010 4:34 PM

I haven't had much of a sex drive since I gave birth to my son who is now 2yrs old. I don't want to have sex until I'm having sex, basically, which I know is extremely frustrating for hubby. I'm trying to work on it, but I think I could go without sex for a year and not really care. Maybe if you agree to have sex once a week, or say yes every third (or fourth, or fifth) time he asks it might help.

MamaLogic - October 28th, 2010 4:36 PM

I am going through this too. I have no desire, don't like my post-baby body, and am too tired. I will every third or fourth time he asks, but I never initiate. We have come to an understanding, though, so he doesn't take it personally. Make sure you have a conversation with your hubby so that he knows it's not him. It may make it better for you.

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